December 14 2023

They want to be held.

The younger one seeks it out. He comes to find me, in my chair or on my bed or at the stove. If he’s not at my side I know soon enough I’ll hear quick footsteps on the hardwood floor grow from faint to loud, then there he is.

The older waits for it. He will stay wherever he is — reading on his bed, drawing at the kitchen table, popcorn and a show on the couch, for hours. When I go and sit next to him he wraps his arms around me tight and says, “Where were you? I missed you.”

I need to keep these two moves in mind: receive and go towards. A third move: teach them to do the same. That’s the work.